Divorce rates in general have reduced in the
Couples who had enjoyed long marital spells crossing a quarter of a century or more are busy trekking down to the divorce courts. Quite a few of them are neither inclined towards monetary benefits nor are they required to fight child custodial battles. All they need is peace and lots of it in the post divorce phase. Unfortunately, their expectations are hardly met. Divorce at this stage of life is extremely difficult to handle for both the spouses. The long for peace but are met with extra stress after divorce.
Does Divorce become Harder to Bear with Age?
Majority of the older aged divorces had been petitioned by the women. They dream of long periods of rest for grappling with spousal sickness leaves them exhausted. (Men in the later 60s are more prone to sickness and are nursed by their wives.) However, these women find no reduction in their workload. Their old jobs just get replaced by a new set. For, over the years they had unknowingly depended much on their husbands. After divorce the need to shop, handle financial accounts, care for the pets, service vehicles, etc appear overburdening. Men also depend much on their spouses who not only used to care for them during the sickness but also handled their social requirements. The post divorce phase thus gets marked with spells of loneliness and fear that slips into depression.
These stresses and strains are compounded with the ‘empty nest syndrome and ‘post retirement blues.’ All through life these couples had concentrated on giving their 100% to their job and being wonderful parents to their children. Being left with nothing to do is in itself an extremely stressful situation and this grief is accentuated with divorce problems. Couples at this juncture require much emotional support, and divorce totally deprives them of it.
Emotional Support and Human Company
Need for company and emotional support are requirements every human needs life long. This need increase with age. . Post divorce men tend to isolate themselves from their family. They are also slow in seeking external help from support groups. They sorely miss the company of their wife for, in majority of the cases their spouse was their sole company.
However, women occupy themselves by providing day care to their grandchildren. They spend much time with their grand children to fill in the long hours after retirement. They also join divorce support groups. Though, divorced women perform well on the social front, their financial life is marked with difficulties.
Financial Strain
The majority of the divorced women are job holders. However, it is a commonly known fact that women earn less compared to their male counterparts. Majority of them do not draw a pension too. All their life they had not bothered much about finances or bank accounts. This financial dependency makes them risk prone and they might receive lesser financial benefits as hidden assets or properties do not figure during separation.
Subsequently, their life changes overnight. From a life lived in abundance they zoom down to monetarily crunchy days. They are in no position to start earning again. However, men are rich in the post divorce period due to their lifetime of earnings. These pension holders are not worried about making ends meet.
Yet, the comfortable financial front is of hardly any comfort to them. Divorce induces depression in men. Such depressed men are on the rise for divorce of older aged couples is greatly increasing. (Couples aged in their 50s to 80s are divorcing.)This widespread near global increase of older aged divorcees has led to the coining of a new term, ‘the grey divorce.’
The period after divorce is rocked with difficulties, yet these people perceive a silver lining at the end of gloom. Though, remarriage is not on their minds when they file for a divorce a majority of them tend to eventually remarry. They use these problems to strengthen themselves. After all, adversity is the best teacher.
